Nuralink Update

Needle stick in the arm.

The microchips did not take.

Error 5-0-4

August Poem 30: Batman, the Very Dark Knight

Would you believe Batman a murderer?

Murdered a goon or three. In cold blood. And

Encouraged Robin’s murder spree as well.

The campy Adam West version Batman

A murderer! World’s greatest detective.

What did he think happened? Batman. You split

Their atoms right out of existence. Hard

Water infused henchmen. Now nuclear

Fallout. Batman, do not their lives matter?

Working for the Penguin should not be a

Death sentence. Having the Joker reduce

You to dayglow dust should not be a death

Sentence. Should all henchmen dread the Batman?

The judge. The jury. The law. The Batman.

July Poem 3: The Cosby Show Band

Thelonious Monk,
Erroneous Consent,
Felonious Dose,
Rapacious Fuck,
Sanctimonious Attorney,
And Bill Cosby
All joined a band hand in hand
To violate the sleeping woman.

April Poem 2: NaPoWriMo

Reach through the cell bars
Scream for escape
From the rainbow butterfly
In your backside

January Poem 2

What kind of man puts oil in his beard?

Next thing you are going to be perming it

And coming in Just For Men to hide the gray.

 

A beard is supposed to be this scraggly thing

Hanging on to the bottom of your face

Pushing out every which way.

It is supposed to be a statement to the world:

Look at me. I am so lazy

That I can’t even run a razor over my face

Before I begin the day.

October Poem 30 Tweet Poem: Mixed Up Movies

The haunting of Hillstreet blues

Basketball diaries of a mad black woman of the traveling pants

Driving Mrs. Madea

The American president dumb and dumber staring GW Bush and Donald Trump

Planes, trains, and passenger 57

The best little chainsaw massacre in Texas

Her purge

The Friday after tomorrow

October Poem 23 Tweet Poem: Shit Weasels

 

Tormented by nerves

Butterflies that burst my chest

Like the Aliens franchise

At least it’s not Stephen King’s

Shit weasels

October Poem 12 Twitter Poem: Terrible Things

Terrible Things

 

Pickled pigs lips.

Garlic flavored mouthwash.

Tuna scented douche.

Anything sold at Wal-Mart.

October Poem 11 Tweet Poem: Magic 8 Ball Answers

Magic 8 Ball Answers

 

I’m sorry. I wasn’t listening.

I just farted.

Nobody cares.

Have you ever heard of Google?

Dude, how about a breath mint.

What the fuck are you asking me for?

Shut up, and grow a pair.

Slap me silly and call me Susan.

You’d be magic too if you had 8 balls.

404 Error.

Click here to buy more 8 ball points if you would like to see more answers today.

October Poem 10 Tweet Poem: I’m a Geek

I’m a Geek.

 

I have an extensive collection of caterpillar turds.

I am spiritually connected to an invisible aardvark.

I love women with facial hair.

I like to speak in dots and dashes.

I have a clown shoe collection.

I am hot for anime characters.

I dream in Star Trek quotes.

My favorite TV show is a musical.

Geeks get all the girls.